none of those technologies that you mentioned execute on the browser at all
sounds like you haven’t met webassembly yet :D
- https://github.com/seanmorris/php-wasm
- https://github.com/ruby/ruby.wasm
- https://github.com/m-butterfield/django_webassembly
please don’t take this as a recommendation to use that, but it does exist.
just like AI Gore