It’s you.

The tiny newspaper is littered with advertisements that you gotta block by wearing these specially glasses.

Or just install one of those distros and keep money for yourself?

Check Fedora Atomic. It’s pretty much an install and forget system (with auto upgrade enabled)

Using Fedora Atomic is like having a dedicated team of fedora engineers manage your system and you only have to mess with your desktop settings.

And this is the reason for death in the first place.