I have a cousin with a dingdong like that. Super pale with a bright pink toadstool tip.

Haha, when we were kids I caught him doing his thing a few times. He did this odd thing like he was starting a fire with a stick.

So bizarre. Enjoy the mental image.

I agree with you, but silly baseless insecurities being expressed all the time just hurts the people around you for nothing.

I expressed it once early in our relationship and there’s no reason to express it again. I’m stupid for feeling the way I do and I should carry that stupidity quietly.

Wellll, my wife is bi. I have a constant (not really constant, just when my insecurity is dragged out by a nightmare or something) nagging fear that she’ll leave me for a woman one day. (I’m a man).

Maybe it’s just an extra layer because it potentially opens more doors.

You know how some things people say just echo in your head forever? You hear a thousand points from a thousand people and most of it just goes in one ear and out the other, but something sticks for some reason or other and it just echoes in your brain.

An idiot, misogynist, redneck said to me, “once ‘ey get uh little pussy it’s a matter uh time. They want it like anybody who wants it, and they won’t go without it forever.”

When I’m feeling particularly insecure, that dumb shit just shows up in my brain.

I’m aware that I’m being stupid. I don’t express this to my wife because I’m being stupid and I know it.

Well, overly stupid people scream their insecurities out loud constantly.

I’ve met some really, really stupid gay people. They’re people like anyone else, of course.

The truth is, if I were to hand myself over to my sexuality entirely, I’d be fucking as many people as I could as often as possible. My sexuality isn’t all I am. It’s a small part of who I am. I just have to trust that my wife is as serious about us as I am. She hasn’t given me a reason not to trust her.

I guess my point is, idiot+insecure=bigotry.

If my wife ever leaves me for a woman, I won’t let it verify my insecurity. She could just as easily leave me for a man. No point in letting my insecurities make me a bigot. Gay people aren’t immune to bigotry.

And no one did a thing when they were on the verge of having them because North Korea doesn’t have anything worth taking would be my guess.

I did that for a while, and I’ll be exaggerating my uselessness but here goes.

“No, that can’t be him. See, the man who did the robbery was wearing a pair of pantyhose on his face. This guy has no such article of clothing on his face. His friend had on a ski mask, I don’t see a ski mask on this man’s face. Yeah, they’re wearing the same shoes but what about the face coverings, hmmmmm?”

As a stay at home dad, I should have time to accomplish something, but I don’t. I just clean all day and chase kids around.

Then I get insecure and have nightmares where my wife is telling me she’s moving out because she found someone else who has a good job.

I plead with her, “I’m only doing this because you told me to! I’ll go work wherever. We’ve got it good. We’re happy. Why are you doing this? I would have never quit my job without you telling me to do just that, and this is what it gets me?”

I really wish I could stop my brain from creating all of this stupid shit when I go to sleep. I at least wish I could sleep through it and forget about it.

I at least know it’s just my insecurity and I don’t make it her problem. I had an ex who would dream I cheated or that I was leaving her and she’d be pissed at me for days haha. I was all, “look babe, I didn’t fuck her, you practically just seen a drawing that your brain made of me fucking her. You can’t hold that against me!” :p

This. As a hillbilly with no access to books growing up, with my education practically stopping at the 4th grade and no stores in sight to purchase books from, I would have never had access to the things I read without piracy.

I half believe that’s why it’s an issue in the first place.

I started my reading adventure at 640x480 on windows 98.

Oh this is rad, thank you!

This is fucking funny. :p

You gotta get longer cut tobacco and a scale to keep it consistent.

I process my non-processed foods in hopes that it will kill me quick quicker. :p

I’m so dark and cold inside. You wouldn’t understand.

Huht huht huht

I love drinking until I’ve had a drink, and then I do that again every single day. I don’t drink a lot but it’s still aggravating.

My mother quit smoking 25 years ago and still has panic attacks about it every few weeks.

That pisses her off so she won’t ever smoke again.

Meanwhile idiots like me ended up vaping all day long and when I went back to cigarettes my tolerance was through the roof and I smoked more than I ever did.

I can relate.

I never got as bad as my father, who used a lighter once a day and lit the rest of them off of the last one.

I roll my own. Cheap as hell, but I wish I could stop. I’d lose my goddamn mind if I did.

I do both! Wooohoooo!

So start smoking and you won’t even notice.

Seriously though, as a lifelong smoker I do my best to keep it from being anyone else’s problem.

I wouldn’t have seen the two thin legs without y’all helping me.

Probably because I grew up during the “let’s all look like Jonathan Davis” era.

It’s just like anything else honestly.

I have a cousin with a sometimes stiff button for a penis a he has never dated below a 10.

His wife is gorgeous and his kids are beautiful. Been married almost 20 years and had multiple flings before that, as well as girls going batshit insane over him all his life despite an entire small town seeing his shorts come off at the local pool.

I told the guys on the Reddit small wiener community about this ages ago and they told me to go to hell in that life was miserable and I didn’t understand and was making it up. Well, I might not understand personally, but I’m definitely not making it up.

Women don’t get a damn, not really. Your bros might give you shit, but most women don’t care.

Some do. Some don’t like guys who eat Cheetos and want a dude who eats healthy and works out. Oh well. She ain’t the one.

Don’t stress.

You know what made life so easy with the women for my cousin? You can see his confidence a mile away. He’s brilliant and he knows it. So are you. Know it.