I would probably be unable to buy a PC or console ever again.

Shit dude, that’s rough
If I may ask, what happened?

Otherwise, no nearby gaming cafés? They’re usually reasonably priced

people just don’t want to work anymore

NO

THEY CLEARLY FUCKING DO

BUT YOU FUCKING GREEDY CUNTS KEEP FIRING EVERYONE AND TAKE FAT FISCAL QUARTER BONUSES

AND THEN IT’S A 19 STEP INTERVIEW PROCESS WHEN THEY TRY TO LOOK FOR A NEW JOB

AND THAT’S IF THEY’RE “LUCKY” ENOUGH FOR THE DOGSHIT AI TO RANDOM.CHOICE() THEIR RESUME OUT OF THE 900+ OTHER DESPERATE APPLICANTS

THEN THEY FINALLY SOMEHOW GET AN OFFER: $1.89 per full uninterrupted hour at your desk and a single bag of skittles (opened)

Sorry for the caps, I’ve been in the job market recently and it’s fucking brutal. I have to constantly justify my value as a human being and then just face rejection after rejection.

I genuinely don’t know how to answer this question

“I really don’t know, man. 5 years ago I did not see myself having lived through a global pandemic, be clinically institutionalized twice and have fucking AIs argue with me on the internet. You might as well ask me to describe the 5th spatial dimension.”

Fuck it, if I worked there, I’d straight up just steal from his office while he’s doing bumps in the bathroom

It’s nothing personal

I’m not comfortable around anyone

I will swim across the Atlantic ocean if that’s what it takes

DO NOT SHOVE SPRINGROLLS UP YOUR ASS

Same.

The entire concept of mensa always rubbed me the wrong way

It just feels like its only purpose is to be a magnet for narcissists.

You’re supposedly one of the smartest people alive, and yet you somehow concluded that a good use of your limited time on Earth is to blow smoke up your own ass with a group of other pretentious jerkoffs who know how to cheese IQ tests

I’m declaring war on Iran because the Ayatollah fucked up my McChicken ☝️ and we don’t like that 👐 they say sir how do you fuck up a McChicken and I tell them it’s too much sauce and you can’t do that

emergency perc purity ring

pay the gay unaway

the feds confiscated my laptop because I kept sending them extremist laughables

100 year old artifact

Ive seen these JD Vance facemorphs so many times that when I saw an actual image of him the other day I almost couldn’t recognise him

I’d respect it

Every other technique I’ve used to attract goth girls has failed so I’d be willing to try this

As far as cringe goes, I feel like it has some self awareness baked in, so it’s not the worst, but yeah nah if I saw a 40 year old man wearing this I’d wince a bit

but what about ball sport

Okay so let me think out loud

August is month 8

It takes 9 months for babby to formed

Okay so 9 months prior to August is…

Wait fuck does that include the first month

No wait yeah

So human mating season peaks in December

Makes sense.

In the north, it’s too cold to go outside and play ball sport, might as well impregnate partner.

In the south, it’s too hot to go outside and play ball sport, might as well impregnate partner.

So the solution to the declining birth rate is to criminalize ball sport

I will take my findings to the UN

Mr Stamina

I don’t know what it is, but if you tell me “You shouldn’t laugh at this because only 13 year olds laugh at this” before you show me something, I will involuntarily laugh 200% harder.