That is one reason another is one my company does often. See in most cases you get hired as a contractor, so no pto no benefits no holiday pay etc. So let’s say a manager has a contractor who is really good and they want to make them a permanent employee. First they have to convince upper management that the manager deserves a full time employee. Now they have to create a job offer, open to all internal and external applicants. They need to collect/sort resumes, they then select a series of people to interview. Now in 99% of cases the recipient is already choosen and the interviews don’t matter but they have to put on a show. Then the manager has to explain why the other applicants are worse and the employee who is still a contractor actually deserves the permanent position. Then only then will the contractor be offered a employee position.

Also we must keep 20% of all the workforce at each site as contractors. So full time positions only appear when either a bunch of contractors are hired or employees quit either of which throws off the ratio. We have lost many great employees due to this policy.

Schrodinger’s washed hands

It’s a great time as space age aka 2.0 just released. If you’re the type to get absorbed into min/maxing stuff, remember to say goodbye and I love you to your family before launching factorio.

No! That’s $10 fine! Send me a private message and I’ll give you the address to send the iTunes gift card serial number to pay the fine(yes internet fines are only payable in iTunes gift cards)

Fucking Dave…

Not you Dave2, specifically u/FuckingDave

My doctor said I should not drink brake fluid, I told him not to worry… I can stop anytime

I went to dragon con one year, people were dressed in all sorts of costumes even though it’s not a furry con. And I know the hotels where the con is are incredibly hard to book. That said just once I want some senior executive to accidently book a room in one because he has some meeting with a potential client of something and just so happen to click it at the right time.

He shows up and is completely bewildered by all the people in costumes. “you’ll never believe it mark. I rode down the elevator with a robot and I swear to God… Tiny from Bob’s burgers”

I do this alot but I alway follow up with “Do you know what blah is?” and depending on age/experience/acronym or term I ask them to explain it.

Sometimes I get assigned work with a senior engineer(where I learn) and sometimes I get asked to help a new person. For example right now I’m in a project being driven by a senior engineer but was asked to assist a professional development program employee(or pdp) to actually execute the project. As a result this is the habit I developed to 1. Make sure I don’t confuse people with random acronyms or terms 2. Ensure we are on the same regarding definition(and they are not just saying yes I know when they don’t).

But can he lie about it? Can his brothers deny?

I hear they have a wand that is magical…

I’m a real man… I’m going to work at Hitachi making large heavy construction equipment… Like cranes and back loaders… Wait what do you mean “personal massager department”???

Not to mention the amount of analog clocks that are just wrong. I work at a fortune 500 company, most clocks are digital and synced to a time server. Every analog clock is wrong. Just yesterday I walked through the cafeteria and glanced at the clock and it read 5:20… For a second I panicked and was like it can’t be that late. I checked my phone, it was 3:06. The clock was just not set properly.

Why is there only one badger and not three? Why is there no snake ?

If I confess to what I did on a dare is that a truth or dare?

I’m also a software engineer (at least in title). I agree with the social skills but a different thing came to mind. The ability to actually watch and understand what people are trying to do. I’m lucky as all my software is internal to my company. I don’t make what we sell, I make what tests the products we sell. And yes I test the tests and also test the test’s tests 😭.

I’ll give an example. I have an operation where the operator is to scan a number off a paper before testing. That number is for traceability we need to know which test results are for which unit. Previous engineer said since it’s scanned off the unit it will never be incorrect as long on the printed barcode is correct(separately validated) so no need to verify format.

I ran into an issue where units had an extra zero either before or after the number. So if number was 12345 sometimes it would be 012345 or 123450.

I went to watch the process. The operator scanned the unit( I watched them work all day, this was 1 unit out of a whole days work) and when they put the scanner down the scanner’s corner was on the 0 button of the keypad.

We did a 2 phase remiduation. Stage 1. Operator instructed to log in and then place keyboard on shelf away from workplace. Stage 2. Verify the number is in correct format in code. Yes the code update is simple but in our field needs weeks of work to test, validate, and release.

Actually watching the operator closely identified the problem. The code was not the issue, the code passed all requirements and tests. The issue was the tests and requirements did not match the user’s experience but if I stayed in my cube as for weeks I would not of been able to find the bug.

I equate an AI to an intern. It’s useful for some stuff but if I’m going to attach my name to it I’m going to review it and probably change a lot about it.

We can’t let you bring this bottle of “water” on the plane because it me an explosive…so I’m just gonna to throw it into this garbage can full of all the other potential explosives in the most densely packed area of the airport…

my entire family has diarrhea it runs in our jeans…

I know that for FDA or BSI we can’t offer anything at all. We can’t even let them use our building water to drink, they must bring there own water.

One time we worked with the FDA to help expose some new auditors to a real audit(we were not really being audited but told to treat it like a real audit). One of the new auditors didn’t bring anything to drink, assuming there would be water provided. Nope, the senior auditor made them sit there all morning being thirsty and when we broke for lunch the new auditor went across the street to CVS and bought a bottle of water. I felt kind of bad for them. But every other day they arrived with a big bottle of water :-D

Sorry the closest I can do is a xj jeep…I don’t know of a js model car