I am an Indian and I have become hyperaware of the people and the culture that surrounds me and I am beginning to see the flaws in it. One of the flaws that trouble me the MOST is how most Indians behave when they encounter any authority figure (mostly higher class or “higher” caste or the wealthy or the bureaucrat class).

When an average Indian walks into a Government office with a corrupt bureaucrat in it, he begins treating himself as an insect, he is way too afraid and he is way too submissive and slavish, this doesn’t end here however, if you meet someone of a higher social status than yourself you become slavish and submissive there too and this happens every time an authority figure is in the room and even with people who think very highly of themselves(at their homes, with their families etc.,) I dress well and look somewhat well so once I had a guy who is my father’s age call me sir and use language which is reserved for “the higher classes”. This is not ok! I wish he had a spine, I don’t want to be him when I grow up, but I know he didn’t choose to be that way, it’s the environment he was brought up in and not being aware of one’s own slavishness.

I am not blaming my people, but I do detest the culture which caused this. And don’t be fooled, I am not an observer, I (used to) do this too and I hate this

It’s like our bones melt and our brain switches off and we become in our own eyes the lowest form of life on earth. Probably justifiably because the education we have received is subpar (counter-productive) in most cases. And you can’t think highly of yourself if you are capable of doing anything productive, but it’s not just that, it happens with those people who are productive members of the society, but to a lesser extent.

I have heard many Southern Asian countries are like this in this aspect. So, I was wondering how you treat authority in your culture and if you thought it was healthy. I would be very much interested if your culture is similar to mine and what you think might have caused it.

And most importantly, how do you think I can get rid of this disgusting habit, is it even possible in India? (fellow Indians jump in here)

edit: Thanks to everyone who replies! :)

  • Elise@beehaw.org
    0·
    6 months ago

    I’m from the Netherlands so I can give you my perspective of what it’s like here. Cultures are complex and nuanced so I hope I’m able to explain it, and of course it is only my own view.

    People here openly flaunt authority. But it isn’t really something you do, it’s something you are. It’s just natural and even expected of you. People also don’t tend to mince words and will often tell you what they think. It’s not rude, it’s a sign of respect to be forward.

    Since I work internationally that can sometimes lead to interesting situations. In their culture it might be final when a boss says what should be done. For me it is completely natural to say it makes no sense and we should continue the meeting or reconvene later.

    Politeness is not really much of a concept here. If you are being polite you’ll run into misunderstandings with people. They’ll full on simply not understand what you are talking about if you’re being indirect.

    We have formal and casual pronouns. If you use the formal ones, almost everyone will stop you. It will make them uncomfortable. Even if the relation is professional.

    Talking to say a dentist or cop feels like talking to family you don’t know so well. I once called the cops and she calmed me in a motherly way and then shared her business ideas for my business and told me she’d come visit with her entire family that weekend.

    Bosses are an interesting topic. Everyone will pretend like everyone is equal, but of course the boss still secretly has control, and politics are a thing.

    I’m not into Dutch politics but I know the prime minister rides a bicycle to work and I don’t think he has a security detail.

    Anyway, that’s the general feeling I get, but of course people come in all shapes and sizes just like anywhere else.

    Also I wanted to say that afaik the Indian classes were supercharged by the British. Perhaps because of their own class structure or perhaps to divide and conquer. That might be something interesting to look into.