"Equivalence’ of does not mean “same-same”, here, female aggression patterns are quite different than male ones. Bold “accept me as dominant, I’m telling you don’t show up or else” vs. plausible-deniability “oh someone must have forgotten to invite you”, “We didn’t think you want to come”. Apologies to any gals out there reliving high-school trauma right now.
To breach a broader topic: The very fact that a sentence like “all masculinity is toxic” can even be defended. When it’s defended, then generally as “Well we define “masculine” not as what men do but as whatever is toxic in society” – and then conveniently sweeping under the rug that that is not how “masculinity” is understood in any other context. As said: Plausible deniability. Motte and bailey: You can say a misandrist thing, have it understood as misandrist by your fellow misandrists, then, when called out, say “no you don’t actually understand do you even feminism read theory you’re a misogynist for misconstruing me”.
The worst thing one can do? Explain it openly. That does not just attack the concrete thing itself, but the very tactic of plausible deniability. It’s, admittedly, the nuclear option but sometimes plain necessary.
Andrea Dworkin.
"Equivalence’ of does not mean “same-same”, here, female aggression patterns are quite different than male ones. Bold “accept me as dominant, I’m telling you don’t show up or else” vs. plausible-deniability “oh someone must have forgotten to invite you”, “We didn’t think you want to come”. Apologies to any gals out there reliving high-school trauma right now.
To breach a broader topic: The very fact that a sentence like “all masculinity is toxic” can even be defended. When it’s defended, then generally as “Well we define “masculine” not as what men do but as whatever is toxic in society” – and then conveniently sweeping under the rug that that is not how “masculinity” is understood in any other context. As said: Plausible deniability. Motte and bailey: You can say a misandrist thing, have it understood as misandrist by your fellow misandrists, then, when called out, say “no you don’t actually understand do you even feminism read theory you’re a misogynist for misconstruing me”.
The worst thing one can do? Explain it openly. That does not just attack the concrete thing itself, but the very tactic of plausible deniability. It’s, admittedly, the nuclear option but sometimes plain necessary.
Cue “No this isn’t happening”.