Which side of the bed is the left side? Is the answer based on the perspective of laying in the bed (person’s head at the head end)? Is the answer based on viewing it from the foot of the bed, looking at the head of the bed? Is there an “anatomical position” or special terminology like in boating for this?

For context: My boyfriend and I can’t agree on this. We change who gets which side based on the shoulder we’d predominantly sleep on and how it’s feeling. This let’s us get good cuddles before shoulder pain gets irritated. He comes to bed after me. A while back he asked what side I’m sleeping on. I said “left”. Later that night, he comes in and almost lays directly on me because he claims “left” is the other side. Since then we have to describe which side using complicated descriptions.

  • nudny ekscentryk@szmer.info
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    7 months ago

    Obviously the perspective of lying on the bed face-up. Though I may be biased because our bed is next to the window (feet side) so you can’t look at it form the foot of the bed – either from the side or behind our heads

  • JackbyDev@programming.dev
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    7 months ago

    Imagine you are driving the bed. If you lean up you’re looking forward. You could call them driver and passenger side based on this. Sort of like port and starboard lol.

  • TheButtonJustSpins@infosec.pub
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    7 months ago

    Right, left if you’re looking at the bed from the foot.

    Stage right, stage left if you’re looking out from the bed toward the foot.

  • all-knight-party@kbin.run
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    7 months ago

    I’d say it’d be from the perspective of laying in it, since no one cares what side of the bed is which unless they’re going to lay in it

    • calabast@lemm.ee
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      7 months ago

      Ah, but as you say, people only care when they’re “going to” lay in it, meaning they’re not in the bed yet. Once you’re in bed, you pretty much never need to specify the left or right side, you can say “shit, i spilled a drink on your side!”

      So, since we only care about left and right sides while we’re not in bed, I say who cares about the in-bed perspective. What matters is how it is oriented while you’re standing up and looking at it. So that’s how I’d assign left and right side.

      • all-knight-party@kbin.run
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        7 months ago

        To that, I’d say it’s likely better if we use landmarks. Identify unique furniture or a window or something on each side. Then, refer to them as “Window side” or “Lamp side”.

  • Melatonin@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    7 months ago

    Lie in bed on your back. Stick out your left hand. That is the left side of the bed. Stick out your right hand. That is the right side of the bed.

    Completely arbitrary.

  • TostiHawaii@feddit.nl
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    7 months ago

    If you lay in the bed, depending on if you are lying on your back or stomach, left and right still change.

    Ususally a bed is positioned with the head against a wall, so if you are facing the bed from the foot end, left and right are always the same. So I vote left/right is as seen from the foot end of the bed.

  • Mesophar@lemm.ee
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    7 months ago

    “Complicated descriptions”? Is there a lamp on one side, or a closet door? Just use that as a frame of reference, I wouldn’t call that a complicated description. Or, if you usually have the same bigs-poon, little-spoon orientation, you can describe which shoulder you’re laying on. But I still think using features of the room is the simplest way. “I’m laying on the closet side.”

    • Mostly_Harmless_Variant@lemmy.worldOP
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      7 months ago

      Fair point. Complicated descriptions may have an exaggeration, but relative to simply left/right it’s still mildly accurate. I’m not a sensory thinker so pulling from objects other than what I’m referencing seems like adding a few extra cognitive steps. Silly, I’m aware, but that’s my brain.

  • UnPassive@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    To avoid confusion, just say driver and passenger side.

    I meant this to be a joke, but if you assume your bed drives forward toward the side with your pillows then it actually works. But if you read in bed with a reading pillow then I guess you probably want to drive your bed toward your feet side of the bed…

    • Mostly_Harmless_Variant@lemmy.worldOP
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      7 months ago

      Driver and passenger side confuses me more because of your last point. It’s backwards. But it still needs to be named foot of the bed and not head because it’s where it feet go. So your first point also makes sense. Both are right and wrong at the same time

  • BaumGeist@lemmy.ml
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    7 months ago

    take a cue from the theater folk: stage left/right is defined by the performers’ perspective. Call it “bed left” and “bed right” to talk about it from the perspective of someone on the bed, and “standing left” or “standing right” to talk about the perspective of someone looking at the bed

    Although it’s kinda silly to me that anyone’s default orientation would be from looking at the bed, which is not the position most commonly associated with the thing famous for laying in it.

    • Mostly_Harmless_Variant@lemmy.worldOP
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      7 months ago

      Nice job renaming stage and audience to bed and standing. I would’ve used their original terms. Our bed is not a stage and we don’t entertain an audience so that would’ve gotten weird/entertaining at some point.

      And absolutely agree. I was dumbfounded when he said otherwise. There’s a good few who agree with the logic. Personifying the bed breaks that logic though.

    • nixcamic@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      But that’s the position you most commonly look at a bed from. And when figuring out where you’re gonna get into the bed.

      Like the only time you actually use the information about sides of bed is from the perspective of outside the bed.

      • BaumGeist@lemmy.ml
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        7 months ago

        that’s another flaw: standing left only conflicts with bed left if you’re standing at the foot. At the head they’re the same. On either side, it’s an arbitrary decision.

        Whereas bed left will always be the same side of the bed regardless of its shape, its orientation in the room, or your position in relation to it.

  • kbal@fedia.io
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    7 months ago

    We customarily refer to the ends of the bed as “head” and “foot” which are analagous to the head and foot of a sail in nautical terms. Therefore “forward” in the ordinary bed naturally corresponds to the direction of straight up toward the ceiling, and the port side is the one on your left when lying in the bed facing that way.