I hear “No problem” far more often.

  • nutsack@lemmy.world
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    8 months ago

    why don’t we add more useless sayings to this throaway conversation script?

    thank you
    you’re welcome
    thank you for welcoming me
    you’re thanked as well
    welcome to my house
    allow me to vacuum your dick

    • Einar@lemm.ee
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      8 months ago

      Are you seriously asking?

      If so, here the answer: It is usually used as a polite response when someone thanks you for doing something. It’s a way to acknowledge their gratitude.

      I still hear it a lot. Together with so many alternatives, like “no problem”, " happy to help", “don’t mention it”, " glad to assist", “anytime”, “it was nothing”, “my pleasure”, " sure thing"… and I’m sure there are more.

      • illi@lemm.ee
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        8 months ago

        I think OP was asking what it means as in how it came to haventhe meaning you describe. “You are welcome” seems to be a completely arbitrary thing to say and out of context.

        Other commenters here explained it’s supposed to mean “you are welcome to my assistance” basically - which makes sense, but in the short form it makes little sense if you arenot familiar with the origins of the phrase (as I was until now)

        • ped_xing [he/him]@hexbear.net
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          8 months ago

          I find np a worse message when taken literally. If I even have to write an email, it’s at least a little problem. yw allows for a problem you solved for somebody without suggesting that it doesn’t come at the expense of other priorities. Both will be interpreted the same way by almost everyone, of course.

  • pruwyben@discuss.tchncs.de
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    8 months ago

    Years ago, I had to do customer service training for a job, and one thing they said is to always say “you’re welcome” instead of “no problem”, because some people think “no problem” is rude. But I think it’s a generational thing, and it’s kind of the opposite with younger folks.

      • Snot Flickerman@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        8 months ago

        When a chic-fil-a worker hits you with that, you gotta one-up them with “No! The pleasure is all mine!” and then hit the gas, peeling out cackling because you stole that pleasure motherfuckaaaaah.

        (Or better, don’t go to chic-fil-a)

        • Zeppo@sh.itjust.works
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          8 months ago

          I told a bartender “oh, the pleasure was all ours!” one time just sort of joking around and he said “you have no idea how much”. I wasn’t really sure how to take that.

            • Zeppo@sh.itjust.works
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              8 months ago

              Yeah, I saw a few intepretations:

              • he was joking
              • he hates his job and all of the customers
              • he hated us in particular (there’d be no reason why though, my gf and I showed up, had a couple glasses of wine, didn’t complain that one had gnats in it, got rained on on the patio, went inside and paid and I had just finished tipping 25-30%)
    • Nyanix@lemmy.ca
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      8 months ago

      I think a lot of younger generation, myself included, prefer casual responses, conflating professionalism with being rude, slimy, or otherwise malintentioned

    • littlewonder@lemmy.world
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      8 months ago

      I’ve been making an effort to use “happy to help” at work, instead of “no problem” because I was also informed it’s a generational thing.

      • sping@lemmy.sdf.org
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        8 months ago

        For paid service I like the simple “of course” recognizing that is what I’m here for and it’s normal. No faux generosity nor implication of a tolerated imposition.

    • illi@lemm.ee
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      8 months ago

      I had to do one communucation trainung where the trainer saud that saying “no problem” should not be used, because it implies there might’ve been a problem. I was not convinced though.

      • MrsDoyle@lemmy.world
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        8 months ago

        Someone said that to me just the other day! That saying “no problem” implies there might be a problem. Crazy. I’m thinking of switching to “well it was quite an imposition on my time and energy to help you out, especially given you’re not paying me, but I’ll let it slide this time because you seem like an ok person and I’m in a good mood” just to annoy them.

        • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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          8 months ago

          I doubt that would annoy them more than “no problem” since it is perfectly in line with what they think you’re saying by “no problem”.

      • blackbrook@mander.xyz
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        8 months ago

        Then “your welcome” implies you might not be welcome. Seems like either both work or both are problematic, he can’t have it both ways.

        • illi@lemm.ee
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          8 months ago

          Agreed. Might also be because “problem” is a word with negative conotation? Idk, I don’t see a problem (hah) myself

      • EveryMuffinIsNowEncrypted@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        8 months ago

        Wow. facepalm The words literally say there’s no problem, and yet it somehow implies there is a problem? Talk about overthinking what someone is saying.

        This is why I often hate neurotypical communication styles. The world would be a lot more straightforward if people just said what they meant. Jesus fucking Christ on a motorbike…

    • Mongostein@lemmy.ca
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      8 months ago

      I think we collectively decided that “you’re welcome” doesn’t make sense. Welcome to what??

        • Pandantic [they/them]@midwest.social
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          8 months ago

          Implying that it was an effort, but you are welcome to it. Whereas “no problem” denotes that the effort is was not a problem for me to do. I use them interchangeably - “you’re welcome” as a response to a complement, or something where there was moderate effort put into the task; “no problem” when the task was low effort (“Thanks for responding to that email so quickly”) or I feel my effort was obliged (helping pick up after a meeting).

          • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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            8 months ago

            Actually “no problem” implies that the thing would normally be a problem, but that you are negating that.

            It’s like saying “No visible bruising”. There’s the implication something happened that might have caused bruising.

      • ettyblatant@lemmy.world
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        8 months ago

        Maybe it’s “you are welcome (to ask me for help/favors, as I am neutral to the task. I might even enjoy it.)”

        And “it’s not a problem (for me to do what you asked me to do; we have now both acknowledged that I have done something to help you that was not organic to me, but now we can move past it with no further conversation.)”

        I bet “no problem” to some people is like seeing someone wear a T-shirt to church. They’d really prefer it if you would put on a suit and tie, even though the purpose of both are the same (cover my body when away from home because that is our current social agreement), because a T-shirt is disrespectful.

        Also everyone sucks, it is a problem, and you are not welcome.

      • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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        8 months ago

        Welcome to what??

        Isn’t that obvious? You’re welcome to the thing you received. The thing you are thanking them for.

    • Empricorn@feddit.nl
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      8 months ago

      During my years in retail exactly one customer ever had a problem with me saying “no problem”. He also said he was an assassin. That’s not a joke. This old, fat boomer said I shouldn’t say ‘no problem’ because some people might take it to mean ‘yes problem’ and then told me he kills people for a living.

      That’s the stability of people that can’t understand the meaning of words. If I go to a police station and say I am a serial killer vs I’m not a serial killer, I don’t expect them to react the same…

  • Snot Flickerman@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    8 months ago

    Disclaimer: These are just my dumb thoughts with zero scientific evidence. Consider the opinion accordingly.

    I think it’s tied to how overwhelmed everyone is at all times now. Part of it is often “thanks” is said while someone is beelining out the door, so you don’t often have an opportunity to even say “you’re welcome.” Further, “no problem” is far more indicative of “actually, you didn’t inconvenience me at all by getting my help” in a society where everyone is absolutely time-starved due to overwork/underpay. It’s saying to the person saying “thank you” that “it’s okay to have minorly inconvenienced me, it was worth doing anyway.”

    Because yes, I am more likely to say “no problem” at this point than “you’re welcome” because most of the time I am dispensing technical information and advice that people usually have to pay to get. That’s the other aspect of it too, we’ve normalized that you have to pay to get anything decent (service or product) and so people offering technical skills and advice outside of a payment plan is definitely viewed differently.

    “You’re welcome” is valid but just doesn’t play well in a fast-paced society where everyone expects to have to pay through the nose for decent help and generally doesn’t have the time to give out those kind of favors themselves.

    • cerement@slrpnk.net
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      8 months ago

      in a society where everyone is absolutely time-starved due to overwork/underpay

      “You’re welcome” can almost appear condescending or stuck up in those situations whereas “No problem” comes across as an attempt to be a little more genuine

  • OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world
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    8 months ago

    I read somewhere a few years ago that the decline of “you’re welcome” is due to a shifting in definitions or whatever- “you’re welcome” has come to mean “you are always welcome to my free labor” whereas “no problem” says something more like “I don’t have an issue spending my time on you.”

  • Cosmic Cleric@lemmy.world
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    8 months ago

    What happened to “You’re welcome!” as a response to “Thank You”? It’s not even included the one canned answers on an apple watch. Have we as a society abandoned it? I hear “No problem” far more often.

    I’ve used both equally. “Thank you!” when I’m more appreciative about what was gifted/helped, and “No problem” when I just wish to be courteous and acknowledge, or I’m indifferent to, the aid that was given me.

    CC BY-NC-SA 4.0

  • Rhaedas@kbin.social
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    8 months ago

    Languages change over time. As long as the intent is clear, don’t get hung up on what is and isn’t “correct”. “You’re welcome” probably was seen as extreme at some point itself.

    • JuxtaposedJaguar@lemmy.ml
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      8 months ago

      Giving permission by saying yes to a “would you mind” question is the hill I die on. Usually I say “I would not mind” but if I’m feeling frisky I’ll say no and watch their brain melt.

    • Ephera@lemmy.ml
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      8 months ago

      I mean, I’m fully on board with not getting hung up on what’s “correct”, but these are words that do have a specific meaning and I do find it interesting that the preferred choice of words shifts (even if it is only caused by relatively few people, that actually think about their word choice there).

      Specifically, “no problem” is kind of like saying “there’s nothing to thank me for”. And ultimately, it kind of says “I don’t expect something in return”.

      Whereas “you’re welcome” acknowledges that yes, I did help you, you are right to thank me for that, and also kind of “I would appreciate you returning the favor”.

      My personal theory is that the change in language happens, because we have a lot more contacts with strangers, either in big/foreign cities or online.
      When you help a stranger, you know upfront that they won’t be able to return the favor, simply because you won’t stay in contact. So, not only should it definitely not be a personal sacrifice for you to help them, it also feels right to communicate that they don’t owe you anything, so that they can go on in their life.

      • Eranziel@lemmy.world
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        8 months ago

        I kind of disagree with you, in that when I think about the standalone meanings of the words in each phrase, I think they do say the same thing.

        The meaning of the words “You are welcome [to the help I gave you]” implies, to me, that there wasn’t actually anything to offer thanks over. You’re acknowledging their thanks, but telling them that they are welcome to take/use whatever it is you’re talking about. [EDIT: normally when someone tells me I’m welcome to something, I feel less compelled to ask and thank in the future. “You’re welcome to anything in the fridge”, for example.]

        It does not imply, to me, that I would appreciate them returning the favour. That might be implied meaning in the phrase, but it’s definitely not what those words mean by themselves.

        In any case, “You’re welcome”, “no problem”, “no worries”, etc… are all idioms that mean something different than what their individual words mean. The phrases as a whole carry a different meaning than the words themselves suggest.

      • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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        8 months ago

        No “You’re welcome” means “You deserved that thing already”.

        That’s why the Spanish equivalent is “de nada”. It means “You’re thanking me for something that was already yours”

        • Ephera@lemmy.ml
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          8 months ago

          I don’t disagree with your interpretation of “you’re welcome”. At the end of the day, it is still a phrase which sort of weakens a “thanks”, out of politeness.
          I’m saying that there’s a difference between “you deserved that thing already” and “there was nothing I did, which anyone would need to be deservent of”.

          And “de nada” is actually a bad example here. Yes, the dictionary will tell you that it’s a valid translation for “you’re welcome”, but the actual words translate verbatim to “of nothing”, as in “you’re thanking me for nothing”. So, “de nada” is very much like “no problem” in Spanish.

    • copd@lemmy.world
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      8 months ago

      I got called out for saying someone was “nuts” for competing in the isle of man TT. Which as a conversational objection, was nuts

  • vzq@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    8 months ago

    “You’re welcome” is a silly colonial affectation. In British English you just shut up and smile.

  • mrcleanup@lemmy.world
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    8 months ago

    Because the customer has become an entitled piece of shit and you don’t tell an abuser “you’re welcome.”

  • Klicnik@sh.itjust.works
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    8 months ago

    It’s too bad Apple don’t think all the thoughts I want to think for me anymore. Oh well. 8GB of RAM is all I need, and I have removed “You’re welcome” from my lexicon.

  • amio@kbin.social
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    8 months ago

    “You’re welcome” was always taught to me as the proper thing, but sounds slightly stilted. They express the same sentiment, roughly, but “[it was] no problem” is arguably clearer about it. I personally just think it’s a slightly “nicer” nuance.

    Of course, sometimes maybe it actually was a problem, and then I’d only say it if going out of my way to be nice about it.

    • SuperApples@lemmy.world
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      8 months ago

      Yes, to me, the nuance is what’s important here.

      “You’re welcome” implies you did something good, and you know it. “I am good for doing this for you. You owe me!”

      Whereas “no problem” implies it didn’t cause you any trouble. “Doing this for you was not detrimental to my life. You owe me nothing.”

        • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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          8 months ago

          To older people such as myself (who were using the words before you younger people were), “no problem” means “the problem you might expect this situation to have caused is in fact not there”.

          It’s for when someone’s gone beyond what they owed you.

          A barista owes you that coffee; it’s their job. You are literally, as a paying customer, welcome to that coffee.

          But someone who has asked a fellow patron to watch their laptop while they go to the bathroom, has received a favor beyond what the roles make expected. This could be a problem, hence the saying of “No problem” to nullify the implied question “Is there a problem?”

          It’s kind of like the way someone might report “No injuries” after a crash (which could conceivably produce injuries).

          It’s the spoken second half of this unspoken exchange:

          “Problem?”

          “No problem”

          • Zeppo@sh.itjust.works
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            8 months ago

            I grew up saying “you’re welcome” but I don’t interpret “no problem” that way at all. It’s never occurred to me even. I tend to say more “oh, of course!” or “hey anytime” though.

      • sping@lemmy.sdf.org
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        8 months ago

        You owe me

        So by saying you are welcome to their action, people are actually saying the opposite? That you are not welcome to it at all? You’re saying it’s ironic?

  • Zahille7@lemmy.world
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    8 months ago

    I usually say “of course” or “absolutely” instead of “you’re welcome” or “no problem.”