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sag@lemm.ee to memes@lemmy.world · 7 months ago

Now I want one

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Now I want one

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sag@lemm.ee to memes@lemmy.world · 7 months ago
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  • comador @lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    Great until it grabs some skin or hair

    • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 🏆@yiffit.net
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      7 months ago

      sleeps in the nude

      Nutsack gets pinched

      • skulblaka@sh.itjust.works
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        7 months ago

        Everyone knows you’re supposed to wear a gambeson beneath your chainmail. Leather or padded cloth is best.

        Ergo, full body gimp suit before bed

        • meliaesc@lemmy.world
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          7 months ago

          Oh good so I just need the chainmail.

      • MehBlah@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        I’m so very scared. Help.

        • Boomer Humor Doomergod@lemmy.world
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          7 months ago

          I understand that reference

          • toynbee@lemmy.world
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            7 months ago

            I don’t.

            • MehBlah@lemmy.world
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              7 months ago

              A not quite twenty year old thread where a guy got his nuts pinched in a chair and asked the internet for help

              https://www.fark.com/comments/2018473/Im-stuck-to-my-chair-Im-so-very-scared-Help-Details-In-thread

              • toynbee@lemmy.world
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                7 months ago

                It seems very likely that I don’t want to click that, but I appreciate the clarification.

                • Boomer Humor Doomergod@lemmy.world
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                  7 months ago

                  I can confirm that’s the source. Don’t worry about clicking it, most of the images are lost to time.

                  Which is a shame. It was hilarious.

                • MehBlah@lemmy.world
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                  7 months ago

                  Its okay really. Funny as hell at the time but none of image links have survived.

              • Boomer Humor Doomergod@lemmy.world
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                7 months ago

                Remember the streetlight thread? That was another great one

                • MehBlah@lemmy.world
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                  7 months ago

                  There were a lot of good ones there. Then it enshitified. They started playing favorites and I left.

      • Boomer Humor Doomergod@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        deleted by creator

    • Wolf314159@startrek.website
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      7 months ago

      Have you ever worn chainmail without an undershirt? Or gambeson? It feels neat at first. Never had to worry about pinching. It didn’t grab any hair. The metal will feel cool and smooth all night. But oh Lord, the awful pain it will bring to unprotected virgin nipples. Like surfing for a hundred years without a rash guard all in one hedonistic night concentrated on the area less than two dimes. NEVER AGAIN. A couple bandaids or pasties the next time and all is good.

      I think you’ll be fine with just a top sheet between you and the chainmail.

      • Event_Horizon@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        So what you’re saying is, he needs to add nipple holes!

        • atomicorange@lemmy.world
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          7 months ago

          Inverse chainmail bikini

          • Knock_Knock_Lemmy_In@lemmy.world
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            7 months ago

            This explains the lesser known war cry of

            “Don’t fire until you see the pink of their nips”

    • ☂️-@lemmy.ml
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      7 months ago

      ill buzz my entire body for the heatsinking properties of aluminium, on this infernal heat

      • LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        And cover your nipples with bandages.

  • imPastaSyndrome@lemm.ee
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    7 months ago

    Prevents some forms of murder!

    • gibmiser@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      Assassin shows up like. Bro whatthefuck is this?

    • SSJMarx@lemm.ee
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      7 months ago

      deleted by creator

      • lennivelkant@discuss.tchncs.de
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        7 months ago

        Pretty sure the Nazgûl use stabby weapons, where chainmail is less effective (not completely useless, but an unlucky thrust may split the rings).

    • FenrirIII@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      That’s when you drip some poison into their ear.

  • rsuri@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    And unlike most kinds of chain mail, this one is also effective at protecting the user from any thrusting attacks that could lead to penetration.

    • scutiger@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      Some of us are into penetration

      • MonkderVierte@lemmy.ml
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        7 months ago

        You aren’t?

  • ODuffer @lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    You got Mail

  • Apeman42@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    They make loosely braided weighted blankets. They won’t be as cool as this, but they allow for plenty of weight while still maintaining good airflow. And a far lower risk of scrotum/labia/nipple tragedy.

    • Tai@lemm.ee
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      7 months ago

      Any of those would make a great band name.

      • peopleproblems@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        Wait holy shit you’re right:

        Risk of Scrotum

        Risk of Labia

        Risk of Nipple

        Scrotum Tragedy

        Labia Tragedy

        Nipple Tragedy

        Far Lower Scrotum

        Far Lower Labia

        Far Lower Nipple (uh?)

        Lower Scrotum Tragedy

        Lower Labia Tragedy

        Lower Nipple Tragedy (ok, idk who had a lower Nipple but it’s weird that it’s in the list twice)

        Lower Risk Scrotum

        Lower Risk Labia

        Lower Risk Nipple

        Shit, this might be the biggest combo of band names in a single sentence I’ve ever seen

        • 𝕊𝕞𝕒𝕔𝕜𝕖𝕞 𝕎𝕚𝕥𝕥𝕒𝕕𝕚𝕔@lemmy.world
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          7 months ago

          Far Lower Nipple (uh?)

          That’s the clitoris I think

      • Venator@lemmy.nz
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        7 months ago

        Scrobiaipplegedy

    • conciselyverbose@sh.itjust.works
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      7 months ago

      I’d be more interested in this for the weight. I want more weighted blanket than I can usually find, and I’m guessing this is heavier than that.

    • 2ugly2live@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      I love those! I had bought one with the pockets of beads and hated it, but the braided one is much better. I’ve had mine for a few years now, and it’s still hanging in there.

    • toynbee@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      My wife loves hers and hasn’t experienced any of the aforementioned tragedies… So far.

    • Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee
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      7 months ago

      What kind of classic tragedies do you like?

    • desktop_user@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      7 months ago

      any suggestions on where too find 100+ lb weighted blankets?

  • Restaldt@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    Bros 'tism yearns for the smithy

  • nick@midwest.social
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    7 months ago

    Ow my leg hair ow my back hair ow my arm hair.

    • Pennomi@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      What’s worse is this looks like butted mail instead of riveted mail, so it’ll have lots and lots of little snaggy pokey bits.

      • dual_sport_dork 🐧🗡️@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        I can’t tell from the potato quality of the pic, but that’s likely. Additionally, for contact with anything that hasn’t got a layer of leather between it and me, I would really prefer to have welded rings. Riveted ones are also quite the chafe.

        It appears that whatever pattern this is isn’t a typical 1-in-4 or 1-in-6, so I have no idea how it’s actually constructed.

        • peopleproblems@lemmy.world
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          7 months ago

          Hehehe that reminds me of when I was young. I had 100 feet of 16 or 18 gauge wire, a thing that wound it, and the biggest ass pair of bolt cutters I’ve seen. I made enough for a mail fist.

          I’m never doing it again, but that was an accomplishment.

  • RizzRustbolt@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    Rash city for me.

    • RagingRobot@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      Yeah my pubes would get stuck in there too lol ouch

      • generichate1546@lemmynsfw.com
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        7 months ago

        Buy a razor… There is no way your pubes are better than that chain mesh.

    • PrimeErective@startrek.website
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      7 months ago

      That’s rash city, Jake, rash city!

    • TheRealKuni@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      Do you have an aluminum allergy? I have a nickel allergy, aluminum is something I can usually count on to be safe since it’s not usually alloyed with nickel.

      • RizzRustbolt@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        It’s a mild one, but extended contact like that would be very irritating.

  • Fosheze@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    Fuck, now I want to get into making chainmail. Time to pick up another hobby I guess.

    • Cenotaph@mander.xyz
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      7 months ago

      Careful, from what I hear its an incredibly time consuming one

      • Fosheze@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        It’s like knitting but for MEN™.

        ~/s obviously~

        • Cenotaph@mander.xyz
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          7 months ago

          Coming in scents like “PRIMEVAL GRIME” and “WOODCHIPPER”

          • Chee_Koala@lemmy.world
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            7 months ago

            TITAN MUSKTCHOULLI

          • Fosheze@lemmy.world
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            7 months ago

            Primeval Grime is my favorite music genre.

            • atomicorange@lemmy.world
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              7 months ago

              Also Pinterest aesthetic

      • peopleproblems@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        That’s an understatement.

        If anyone does want to get into it, don’t do steel. Steel is cheap as shit, but you’ll get carpal tunnel before you finish your first bag, belt or tie.

        Idk if you can get like 16 gauge aluminum wire, but that would be far easier to work with. Or brass. just don’t do steel

  • queermunist she/her@lemmy.ml
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    7 months ago

    Oh fuck I was just thinking about how to solve my need for a heavy blanket while not constantly overheating and waking up.

  • JiveTurkey@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    Seems like you would want to use stainless steel instead of aluminum if you’re going for weight.

    Edit: Yes I realize there are better conductors of heat but for the sake of using corrosion resistant welding materials I went with stainless.

    • kitnaht@lemmy.world
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      Stainless is an insulator of heat. In fact, it’s used in 3D printers to avoid heat traveling up the path where the filament is fed in from.

      Copper with a silver or rhodium plating would be a good choice otherwise. Copper has a higher thermal conductivity than aluminum, and silver does as well, but is also hypoallergenic.

      • JiveTurkey@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        I wouldn’t call it an insulator but it is a poor conductor of heat compared to aluminum. I think in this situation either one would be capable of dissipating heat better than just about any blanket.

        • kitnaht@lemmy.world
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          7 months ago

          You would be wrong in not calling it an insulator. Sorry.

          https://www.engineeringtoolbox.com/thermal-conductivity-metals-d_858.html

          Feel free to look at the chart linked above and compare to almost any other common metal.

          Air has a thermal conductivity of 0.028 W/(mK)
          Copper, around 413 W/(m
          K)
          Stainless is 14 W/(m*K)

          In so far as metals go, stainless is a heat insulator.

          • JiveTurkey@lemmy.world
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            7 months ago

            Right, like I said a poor thermal conductivity but as far as blankets go, you won’t find anyone attempting to get warm with chainmail because it would unfortunately result in an increased loss of body heat. In so far as blankets go, not an insulator.

            Also worth mentioning I was trying to stay in the real of possibilities and this case stainless wire is readily available in many forms for welding, and would resist oxidation better than copper. Obviously we can just name the best conductors of heat.

            • kitnaht@lemmy.world
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              Copper wouldn’t be difficult to plate in silver; you can buy plating solutions pretty easily, enough to plate a blanket easily. Copper is also incredibly easy to get, and not only has the highest thermal conductivity but also the highest weight as well. (of malleable metals at least; tungsten beats it out weight wise, but couldn’t be easily formed)

              Stainless also work hardens much faster than copper. Much bending at all and it starts to fracture. It wouldn’t last long as a blanket - though there are ways around that, such as how you make the blanket; chainmail, etc.

              Copper can be thin enough, and malleable enough to be woven like a standard fabric as well, resulting in a ‘softer’ feeling.

              In fact, they already make the stuff: https://nano3dsystems.com/product/copper-nickel-conductive-fabric/

              They make Stainless too - but it only consists of 30% conductive material. https://nano3dsystems.com/product/stainless-steel-conductive-fabrics/

              • JiveTurkey@lemmy.world
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                7 months ago

                Lol. At this point you’re just completely off the rails.

      • Smoogs@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        Silver would just bend though as it would be too malleable on its own

    • harmsy@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      If weight is the only thing you care about, then sure. The only problem is even normal weighted blankets can be an absolute furnace in the summer.

      • desktop_user@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        7 months ago

        just insulate your house and shove an air conditioner on it to lower the temperature to 40°F

        • JiveTurkey@lemmy.world
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          7 months ago

          This is what I’m talking about. Make sure you insulate it with stainless steel though. It’s in the insulation section at your local hardware store.

  • RoidingOldMan@lemmy.world
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    Is this how those people ended up with random piercings/earrings all over their body? Like Xerxes in 300.

  • morrowind@lemmy.ml
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    7 months ago

    What about sound?

    • LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      He wakes everyone within a hundred foot radius every time he tosses & turns

    • RecluseRamble@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      7 months ago

      Earplugs were a game changer for my sleep.

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